For me personally, there was a number of anxieties, not least of which being the premiere of the play I collaborated on with my friend and renowned playwright, Alan Hopgood. “Four Funerals in One Day” is a performance piece that explores issues around life, death, euthanasia and the importance of story telling in palliative care.

“Karen is a community nurse caring for her first dying patient. Clarrie has had enough of being a burden on his family and wants to die now. Vi is tired and bad tempered and wondering why she stays working in palliative care, particularly as she has her own problems at home and Sue is walking the fine line of acting as a mentor for junior staff and supporting a colleague who isn’t coping. Four Funerals in One Day is a performance piece that explores the human reality for patients and professional carers living and dying in palliative care.”

I need not have been nervous! The performances of Alan, Babs McMillan, Margot Knight and Michelle Hall were filled with joy and compassion. They truly captured the emotional rollercoaster of working in palliative care……………….the audience laughed (and some admitted to me later, they cried), but mostly the feedback I got was that it made them think.

As practitioners we have always understood the importance of our client’s stories, but we often forget the importance of our own……….. and how our own stories inform our capacity as carers to support people living with terminal illness.

For me, it was wonderful to sit in an auditorium filled with my colleagues from all around Australia, New Zealand, Canada, America, China, Hong Kong, Japan and the U.K and experience the impact of parts of my personal story, combined with fiction (and Alan Hopgood’s mastery of language and performance).

Including a play as a Keynote address at a high profile conference was a big gamble for the organising committee, but given the feedback, it was a gamble that paid off.

The lesson in all of this? if we are to get people in the community talking about what matters to them, thinking about why they are here and what they’re here to do……………we can’t just stand up and lecture them…………..we need to be creative! Using the creative arts to tell stories and engage people is a wonderful way to do just that without it being confronting or overtly prescriptive. For me personally………….it was a wonderful climax to hours of reflection, discussion and hard work and it has not only made me feel proud of my professional work, but has enabled me to build a friendship with a man I have watched on television since I was a kid…………….Alan Hopgood.

Christmas was wonderful for me, surrounded by family and friends and spent in the midst of the warmest summer we have had in a long time. The funny thing was, we had arranged a full trad Christmas dinner OUTSIDE and it turned out we had the coldest Christmas Day here in Melbourne since 1934!!!! It poured rain, blew a gale and was only 14oC (and that was when it warmed up!) Thank goodness for tarps and big heaters on sticks!

The rest of the time I’ve been working on a creative project with a friend (will tell you more about this in the future), working on a couple of new books, reading, thinking, walking on the beach and planning a conference for later in the year on the coast of Queensland……..stay tuned for more info on this one too!

So I’ve teed up some great guests for the show and promise you will be surprised by my mystery partner who will appear in the next few weeks.

So I wish you all a miraculous 2007, filled with fun, joy, happiness, challenges and achievements and look forward to providing you with lots of Dead Serious info! And don’t forget to check out my new and groovy website by following the link and you can find out a bit more about what I’ve been doing and with whom! Let me know what you think!

Poor, sick, grieving, homeless and lonely people struggle with the whole view of happy families, eating, shopping and celebrating that is continually promoted by the adverters as the ‘norm’, in order to entice us to buy more of their goods.

It is timely to remember that some poeple don’t have the whole “happy family” thing happening, due to a significant death, family breakdown or the total lack of a family. I can’t begin to imagine how awful it would be to spend Christmas alone, no matter the reason……………..maybe this is an opportunity for those of us who are fortunate to have loving families to invite someone along to our celebrations who would otherwise be alone…………….Just a thought!

So from me I wish you all a very Merry Christmas and the next time we talk it will be 2007………….WOW!

Who is David Hicks?

He is an Austtralian citizen who has been held in Guantanamo Bay for five years. David has not been charged, he has had no tiral and he has been abandoned by the Australian Government. He lives in solitary confinment in a small cell with blank walls and a single frosted glass window and where the lights are often left on 24 hrs a day. He has no access to outside communication and if lucky is allowed one phonecall from his family every six months.

Since Davids incarceration 340 other detainees have been repatriated to their countries of origin including Britian, Europe, Asia, Albania, Afghanistan, Iraq, Iran, Pakistan and Yemen, because their governments demanded their release.
Despite not being charged, David has been abandoned by the government…. OUR government. They have left him to be a ’sacrificial lamb’.
David’s American military laywer, Major Michael Mori stated in The Melbourne Age today (Sunday December 3rd 2006) that “The whole system is about Khalid Sheikh Mahommed. It’s not about David Hicks, nobody cares. Nobody in America cares about David Hicks. Hicks is there because of the Australian Government. All they have to do is ask to bring him home.”

David is an Australian citizen. He deserves just, fair and equitable treatment. If he has done something wrong, I’m sure five years in solitary confinement would go some way to proving he has already been punished. Let’s face it if he had been convicted of rape or manslaughter in Victoria he would now be ready for release. But David has been charged with NOTHING let alone been convicted.

David deserves to be home in his own country to spend Christmas with his family. Imagine if David was your father, son, brother or friend.

So if you feel strongly about human rights, understand that it doesn’t matter if David is innocent or guilty, he has a right to JUSTICE. If this can happen to one Australian citizen, it could happen to any of us.

Information on the rallies being conducted over the next week can be found on the Fair Go for David website and you can register your support to bring David home by emailing The Age on bringdavidhome@theage.com.au

Thanks goodness our major print media are finally supporting the cause of justice and human rights. Well done The Age!

So the rest is up to us……………think about it, read about it and if you feel strongly……….DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

It was an amazing program about a man who is incredible knowledgable about the planets, the universe and the moon and yet is happy to share his knowledge with people from all walks of life FOR FREE. Not only does he provide access for people WHERE they are, but he runs classes and teaches people how to make the telescopes.

Why am I telling you all this???? No, I’m not on the payrole for Dobson, but I was spoilt by my beloved and presented with a Bintel BT 152 Dobsonian Reflector Telescope for my birthday and have spent every night since in the backyard looking at the amazing surface of the moon. I always had a bit of a “thing” for the moon and must say I leave crystal bottles of water out under the full moon each month (and yes…….it tastes much better), but when you look at it through the telescope it is AWESOME. You can see every crater, the seas, the mountains and it looks like you could just reach out and touch it!

The night before last I saw the ‘variable, multiple’ star ‘Sirius’, a huge white orb flashing red, blue, green in the lense of the telescope. It looked like a light on a Christmas tree! Considering that it is millions of light years away from earth, it’s a miracle to be able to access it like it was at the end of the street.

I am now eagerly awaiting the big planets to rise above the horizon here in the Southern Hemisphere so I can finally get a close up view of my favourite planets Venus and Jupiter!

Isn’t it amazing that we can now see what the Greek astronomers could only dream about. Thanks to the work and committment of John Dobson, I am able to access the stars up close and personal…………what a gift!

Yes, I’m still alive and well, though have been neglecting both my Blog and the show (for which I’m suitably repentant), but must give you an idea of what I’ve been up to.

The past months have been increasingly hectic in my little world. My ‘day job’ has been extremely demanding BUT great fun and a wonderful brain stimulant. For those of you who dont know what I do during the week…………I project manage one of the three metropolitan Palliative Care consortia here, made up of nine organisations who are funded to provide care to terminally ill people and their families. These organisations range from major metropolitan acute heath services, inpatient units to community providers who care for people in their homes. Our region is that largest and has the biggest population in the state, so it’s quite a job! I am very lucky though as I work with a wonderful team of incredibly passionate people who have such a committment to what they do, that it makes my job a lot easier than it would be otherwise!

So…………that’s my ‘day job’. I also teach at university and regularly speak at conferences and seminars in the health and corporate sectors and to a variety of community organisations on everything from death, grief and loss to complementary therapies, spirituality, self care, legacy and life purpose. I write everything from small articles to manuscripts and education curricula and am currently working on a play with a colleague who is both a seasoned Australian actor, producer and playwrite.

I am on a couple of Boards of Management, the one I am spending the majority of my time on at present is Spirituality Australia a subsidiary of the Father Bob Maguire Foundation, with my pal Fr Bob, Shane Holst and James Grant. I will have more to tell you in the near future about Spirituality Australia which is an exciting initiative that will stimulate people to connect with their personal spirituality in an atmosphere of support and community (yuou can find out more about SA by going to my website.
Amongst all of this I have been working on an idea with my friends Sue and Jan to establish a seminar program starting next year that explores complementary therapies and the angel work we have been doing together over the past couple of years. The three of us went to Sydney in October to the Angel Intuitive Advanced Program that Doreen Virtue conducted, which was a great networking opportunity.

Of course I have been reading, thinking and meditating. The more I think about things, the clearer things seem to become and I really believe the more we focus on manifesting joy and compassion in our world the more we can make “spaceship earth” our reality. We sometimes forget how very powerful our thoughts and feelings are in creating the world we live in. If I’ve learned one thing in the past months it has been to save the energy I used to expend on being angry about injustice and put that energy into thinking and feeling joy, prosperity, sustainability, health and justice for all. This is what will change the world…………..a ground swell of people pouring their energy into manifesting their “preferred future” instead of being worn down by disillusion and disappointment.

So, I hope you will continue to support Dead Serious and I promise over the coming weeks a new and exciting format will provide you with plenty of thought provoking programs with cool tunes and I take great joy in announcing there will be a GENDER BALANCE………..as DS welcomes a new partner in the weeks to come………………YES, I have a male counterpart who will be joining me here on Dead Serious……………so stay tuned!

OH……….my other bit of news………….finally my ‘new, hip and groovy’ website is now live, thanks to my mates at Blue Vapours, Kit and Jane who have done a wonderful job creating a site that is truely reflective of me! So I encourage you all to get along and have a look and leave me an email and let me know what you think! See if you can find the secret tribute to my elemental friends on the Homepage!

That’s it for now team. Talk to you all soon. Remember to visit www.mollycarlile.com and say “gidday”

Molly

Somehow my exploration of all things esoteric has pushed me into mainstream science which is an interesting development I think. Given that I never understood physics when I was at school (in fact I thought it was like Chemestry, but with more words), it has been a revelation to finally understand what Isaac Newton was on about. Now I understand why I never got it! Newtonian physics is so mechanical, it obviously was a paradym beyond my understanding, but the quantum movement of the modern physics…………….well that’s something I do understand!

I think the link between the major concepts of quantum physics (polarities, the role of the observer and the creative power of mind) all link to the work I have done in psychology, palliative care and energy therapies. Finally it’s all starting to make sense!

So I’m off this week to spend another couple of days studying with Doreen Virtue (the angel lady) and Hemetic philosophy is something we’ll be exploring………there is a very strong link between the ancient Hemetic themes and the modern quantum approach…………can’t wait to share with you what I learn.

SO………….watch this space!

As I hung my big black and white Magpie flag in the front window of the house this morning, in preparation for the first finals game we play this weekend, I could feel Dad beside me. I saw (in my mind’s eye) the silly face he used to pull when he threw his head back and laughed. I heard his voice saying, “We’ll do it this year……..don’t you worry” and I smiled.

I love it when Dad just ‘appears’, always at the footy after an amazing Collingwood goal, but often when I least expect it. When something funny happens, when i feel sad or melancholy or often just for no reason at all…………I feel him there, I see his face and I hear his voice………..then I think to myself how lucky I am that he takes the time to be with me, even though he’s no longer here physically.

On the other side of the equation is my beloved. As it happens, he barracks for Footscray (the Bulldogs)…….a legacy from his Dad who died in April 2003. He was a sports journalist, so my beloved spent many Saturday afternoons in the wind and rain with his Dad while he reported on the Footscray football games.

This weekend the first of the elimination finals is between Collingwood and Footscray…………..BUMMER! This means by this time next week, either my beloved or myself (and the two of our kids I have managed to convert to the black and white army) will be miserable and grumpy because the team we love is out of the competition for another year.

I can’t help but wonder what the two Dad’s will think and wether either of us will get a consolatory visit from our respective Dad’s to offer us an ounce of comfort in the midst of defeat.

i know my Dad will be sitting next to me on the couch as we watch the game on the big screen in the loungeroom, add the beloved and his Dad and the couch could get a little crowded come the first bounce of the ball.

Go the Maggies……………………”We’ll do it this year………..don’t you worry”!

So stay tuned folks………… SPIRITUALITY AUSTRALIA IS COMING!

I have done a show on why we have funerals and rituals to assist us in making meaning of significant losses but I havnt yet done a show on planning and conducting a funeral………….so “hold onto your hats’…………..this one will be up on the site by next week.

In the meantime, give some thoughts to the things you would like to include in your funeral.

These awards recognise people who contribute to the social and spiritual wealth of their communities and often receive little or no recognition. The Humanitarian Awards are a way of recognising these people and giving their causes a public profile.

Nominations for the 2007 awards are now open and forms can be accessed on the AAF site . It costs $Au25 to nominate someone and this cost goes to fund the conducting of the awards. The Awards will be presented in May 2007 in Melbourne and I encourage all Aussies to think of a worthy person in the community who meets the criteria and take five minutes to nominate them in one of the following categories: Arts, entertainment and media, charity, education, environment, health.

When you go to the site, you will notice that the dates are different to those I’ve mentioned, IGNORE that……….it’s in the process of being changed. Nominations now close at the end of January 2007. I’ll keep you updated as things move forward.
So GET TO IT and reward someone who contributes for the good of all.

Bob, myself and a couple of other like minded, creative thinking people are madly working on a project that will empower people to reclaim their personal spirituality and share in (Bob’s words) “the common spiritual wealth”.

So it’s all a bit ‘cloak and dagger’ just now until the i’s are dotted and the t’s crossed………..SO WATCH THIS SPACE.

I’ll let you know whats happening in the next few weeks……………keep an ear on Bob’s program too…………..he might just drop a clue.

Can’t people see the futility of shooting bombs at their neighbors when the majority of people who get killed and maimed are civilians? Do poeple not have any sense of proportion and/or ethics?

It would be easy to let all of this violence make us more apathetic…….after all what can you and I do about it?

I’ve pondered this question long and hard and decided I don’t want to live in a bubble. Much and all as I abhor the violence and aggression, I can’t shut it out and pretend it’s not happening………………therefore I need to do something proactive.

So, I’m writing to politicians, talking to people at work and at home, and positively affirming an end to this conflict.

What good will that do? I hear you say……………..well it’s a damn lot better than avoiding the news and pretending that I don’t have an investment in what happens on MY planet and in MY world……………….because it’s MY world and it’s YOUR world………….it doesn’t belong to any one country and no one super power (no matter what they might think)!

So get to it troops…………..write, talk, think and VOTE for a better world. The day will come when all of these elderly cowboys who currently sit in the top jobs in many powerful countries will be sitting quietly in a nursing home somewhere and eating vitamised food …………..they can’t stay in power forever. Our day is coming and we need to know how we’re going to move the world ahead in a peaceful and productive way, caring for the environment, caring for each other and caring for our future and the future for our kids.

I guess I was a bit perplexed. I didnt know who to barrack for, all I knew is I didn’t want Italy to win, so I ended up cheering for the French.

Maybe I’m bitter and twisted, but I still cant quite forgive Italy for their “diving” defeat of the Socceroos. If the circumstances had been different, there would be no question about me supporting Italy, given that my kids live in the centre of “little Italy” in Melbourne and I have lots of Italian friends………..but they weren’t and having watched all of the Italian games, I find the “diving” aspect of their game “poor form”.

Yet again though, it worked…………

So Italy are the champions, despite all of the scandal about match fixing going on at home, despite their relatively ‘lack lustre’ performance in a number of games………the defensive game won out and I think that’s a shame for the game.

On reflection, the games I enjoyed the most over the past weeks are the games where teams tried to score, not the games where teams tried to stop the other team scoring…………..and that is the Italian strategy.

Of course luck has a lot to do with it. Luck of the draw, luck of the referee you are allocated, luck of the umpiring decisions and the luck of your passage through the finals.

France were very unlucky last night. They played better than Italy but were unable to score after their initial goal. The missed penalty occured because the ball didn’t bounce as they would have wished………………and the game was over.

So, to all the teams who inspired and enthralled this predominantly Aussie Rules supporter…………….thankyou. To Croatia, Togo, Brazil, Portugal, Spain, Argentina, Ukraine and all of the other teams who played action packed attacking games that kept me enthralled………Thankyou

THANKYOU to the georgeous Lucal Neil, Tim Cahill, Harry Kewell and JOHN ALOISI and all of the other Socceroo boys who did Australia proud…………..

I’ll never forget the vibe of being among 20K+ of my countrymen and women singing the national anthem at ’stupid o’clock” in the morning in Federation Square and Lygon Street in front of the big screen, with my daughter and her friends………….

What a ride! Roll on the Asia Cup!

Hard to imagine that in a country like India, with it’s huge population, the majority of disease is caused by lack of adequate sanitation. In fact, many houses in New Delhi and other major city centres, do not have toilets. What do they do? I hear you ask? Well, they squat on the street, under bridges and beside rivers…………..hard to believe in the 21st century! 110 million Indian houses have no toilets and 10 million have “bucket toilets” that are emptied onto the streets!
What is worse, “scavanger” women sanitation collectors (who belong to the lowest caste of “untouchables” in the Indian social system), have the role of collecting this human excrement from the streets, and are subsequently shunned by the society because of this work.
Dr Palhak ( a Brahman by caste and therefore high on the social ladder) developed an ecologically sound recycling system in the early 1970’s and set about establishing waste management and sanitation strategies to improve the quality of life of India’s poorest people. To date Dr. Palhak and his foundation have built millions of toilets in India. But his workdoes not stop there, he promotes health programs, education and training and support for the poor of India and has been recognised world wide for the amazing technological breakthroughs in sustainable sanitation developed by his foundation.

This man has invested in the future of his country and his fellow Indian’s, no matter their social or financial status. In fact he is a true humanitarian…………….and it all started by identifying a need and doing something practical about it, even though sanitation is not a “sexy” cause, he has invested heavily in making life better for poor people. We could all learn a think or too from Dr Palhak………a man with true vision!

The vibe was great……………Aussies chanting, Italians chanting……….another great funfilled night of frivolity. I was again surrounded my two of my kids and numbers of their friends. As we headed toward “kick-off” we found a spot amont the 20K plus crowd right up in front of the big screen.

We all sang the national anthem with verve, waving our flags and screaming Ole, Ole, Ole, ole, Aussie, Aussie……..and the game started.

And what a game! I really thouight we were going to win………….and then the decision that was like a kick in the stomach……..and it was all over for another four years.

We walked home disheartened and I must say, a little bitter!

Rather than winge about a terrible umpiring decision that cost us a place in the last eight, I want to remind you all of the importance of coming together and sharing a peaceful event.

If I’ve learned nothing from the Socceroos, I have learned this…………no matter the odds, if you keep putting in all you’ve got and more, even when things seem hopeless, luck may not be on your side, but you earn the respect and admiration of those who have watched you contribute.So what does all this mean to how we live everyday? I think the fact that passionate people from different backgrounds, with different ideas can come together and share something in a respectful and peaceful way is a lesson that many politicians should take on board.

The fact that there is always a winner and a loser, but that a huge impact is made by HOW you win and how you celebrate that win as well as HOW you lose and how you accommodate that loss……….. are things that politicians should learn. Sometimes the loser can actually have more influence in the long term than the winner…………then we should ask what does winning actually mean?

So, for me the past two weeks of soccer (or football as it is called elsewhere) have been exciting, challenging and comforting………….I feel great about my community, a community made up of people from all over the world who have made Australia home, who can support their country of origin in a sporting event without being abused or having to tolerate violent behaviour from their adopted country’s population……………a community that celebrates together and commiserates together…………..we are really lucky.

When I was walking home, a young guy clad head to foot in Italian colours, waving an Italian flag rushed up to me and said “Bad luck love, we deserved to win”. I said “You did win” and as he pulled off his Italian flag to reveal a Socceroos jumper he said, “No we lost, but from now on I’m barricking for Italy” and disappeared into the frenzied croud shouting “Italia, Italia, Italia”

I never thought I’d see the day when I would be madly swept up in “soccer fever”, but I have been. I got up at 0230 and rugged up, packed the thermos and the umbrella and headed into the centre of our fair city with my daughter and her friend to watch the Australia/Croatia game on the big screen with the rest of the diehard soccer fans.

The thing that amazed me was the feeling of expectation and goodwill. All those people crowded together……….a good mix of Aussie and Croatian fans, smiling, talking and singing together. The teams came onto the field and the noise of the crowd singing both national anthems gave me goosebumps! Then the game started.

Despite some dodgy calls by the referees, there was good hearted “oohs” and “aahs”………..with each ‘crappy’ call, toilet rolls were thrown in the air to illustrate the thoughts of the fans! Croatia scored the first goal and the singing was deafening from the Croatian fans…………the Soccerroos equalised and the crowd went wild…………jumping, screaming, singing…….drums thumping, trumpets blowing, flares lit and turning Federation Square into a sea of pink smoke……………another Croatian goal and another Aussie goal………….strangers hugged each other, the drums went crazy, whistles blew, people screamed in unison, “Harry, Harry, Harry”………..Harry Kewell had done it…………..equalised the score and qualifying Australia to progress to the next round.

At 1/4 to 7 in the morning the crowd danced out of Federation Suqare into the junction of Swanston and Flinders Streets……….the major intersection in central Melbourne……….the traffic was at a standstill as thousands of fans poured into the street. Flags were flying, soccer balls being kicked into the sky……two guys danced on top of a tram………..the crowd danced down Swanston Street……………laughing, singing, chanting…………….up Collins Street they marched…………to the steps of Parliment House where they danced some more…………one guy stripped down to his Aussie flag undies and danced in front of the mounted Police. People sang “Our team is red hot………..your team is diddly squat”…………..JUBILATION!

The amazing thing about all of this was that among the laughing, singling, chanting throng of Aussie fans was a whole gang of Croatian fans…………singing, laughing and dancing as well………exchanging good humoured banter and all aware of what a great experience they were a part of.

I was so impressed that there was no anger…………..no bad sportsmanship…………..just good humoured ’stirring’ that was enjoyed by all.

Tomorrow morning I’m heading off to the soccer at Federation Square again………this time we play Italy and I know, with a huge Italian community in Melbourne ……………..the game will be just as exciting to be a part of…………….now that my kids live in Carlton (the home of Lygon Street……..the centre of Melbourne’s ‘little Italy’) I will be cheering for the Socceroos, but will be finishing my day, win or lose…………in Lygon Street with a caffe late and a good italian ‘breaky’.

Sometimes we need to remind ourselves how very great it is to live in a multi cultural country where we rejoice in our similarities AND our differences and celebrate good natured rivalry on the sporting field without it getting ‘out of hand’.

Go Socceroos!!!

It was an interview with a 43 year old man who I knew………..not personally, but as I grew up watching “The Sullivans” on TV, I felt I knew this guy. His name is Richard Morgan and he played Terry Sullivan in the quintesential Aussie TV drama.

Richard and his wife were sharing a very personal story. The story of his diagnosis one year ago, with Motor Neurone Disease. Richard went from being a fit, health man, the father of two young children, to being confined to a wheelchair, dependant on the care of his wife and others. Richard lives daily with the probability that he will be dead within two years.

I know plenty about Motor Neuurone Disease as I’ve cared for plenty of people in the end stages of this awful, wasting disease. I know a number of people who work for the Motor Neurone Disease Association. I understand that it is an umbrella term for a range of degenerative, neurological conditions that can not be defined.

BUT each person’s story is unique. Each person diagnosed and the people who love them, have to live on knowing what awaits them. Every day they loose mobility, strength and function. They have to live on knowing that eventually they will die from asphixiation or choking.

Richard’s story is a powerful one. A story that highlights the lack of compassion often demonstrated openly in the health sector. A story that reinforces the importance of community when things go wrong. A story that is both inspirational and devastating. A story of personal strength and defeat.

I encourage you to listen to the program if you have a chance. I also encourage you to find out more about Motor Neurone Disease by listening to the program I did with Rod Harris, the CEO of the MND Association, late last year on Dead Serious.

I also encourage you to think about Richard and others who are living with Motor Neurone Disease.

I, like millions others, sat up till 2am to watch the Socceroos play Brasil this morning. Come 4am, I dragged myself off to bed, disappointed at our loss, but not devastated…………we played well, but the luck wasn’t with us. That’s OK though, we’ve got a good chance against Croatia and the fact that we’re playing at all is something to celebrate!

As I lay in bed at 4.30am, exhausted, but unable to sleep, my mind wandered…………I started thinking about what other people are awake at this time of the night? Obviously, other soccer fans in the southern hemisphere, but who else?

I thought about people who were lying awake because they were worried and unable to sleep……………the people who are worried about not having enough money to pay their bills, the people who are worried about a son or daughter who is out late, the people who are worried about the security of their job, the people who are worried about a sick family member or friend, the people who are worried about their future, the people who are worried about their relationship………….the list goes on.

I thought about people who can’t sleep because they are sad or depressed. The people trying to come to terms with a loss………..an empty space in the bed where there used to lie someone they loved, the people struggling with the fear and anxiety of depression, the people battling physical pain due to illness or injury, the people feeling frightened because their nighttime hours are full of nightmares.

I thought about the people who cant sleep because they are cold, living on the streets or in refugee camps. The people who can’t sleep because they are hungry. The people who can’t sleep because bombs are ringing in their ears.

Thinking of all these sleepless people made me feel  guilty and then I realised I shouldn’t feel guilty…………..I should feel GRATEFUL!

I snuggled down under my doona, with a full stomach, next to the man I love, in a warm house, in a peaceful country and reminded myself that the day to day things that keep me awake at night are so small in the big scheme of things…………they are not worth the energy I give them………………from now on I won’t let the negative things invade my peaceful thoughts…………..I’ll focus on how very lucky I am and be grateful.

It reminded me of something my Dad always used to say, “I used to complain because I had no shoes……….until I saw the man who had no feet”.

Sometimes we need to remember that man with no feet!

[audio:http://deadserious.thepodcastnetwork.com/audio/tpn_deadserious_20060610_036.mp3]
LISTEN TO PODCAST HERE

This week I explore depression…………….often referred to as “the black dog” because it’s dark, haunting and always ready to pounce on vulnerable people when they least expect it.

What is depression? What predisposes people to suffer from depression? What causes depression? What are the symptoms and how is it diagnosed?

I used to think that people who were ‘depressed’ were self indulgent………….they should ’smarten themselves up’ and ‘get on with it’ like the rest of us…………………that was until I was ‘bitten’ by the ‘Black Dog”.

Depression was contrasted with grief by Sigmund Freud in 1917 in his essay “Mourning and Melancholia”. What are the differences between clinical depression and grief? How does our contemporary understanding differ from Freud’s first ideas
about grief?

What have we learned and how can we help and support people living with depression? How do the needs of people living with depression differ from those of grieving people?

Tune in and learn a little about depression………..an illness that is worryingly underdiagnosed because people are too frightened, too ignorant or too overwhelmed by their symptoms to seek help.

Music provided by Simpatico

For further information and support on all aspects of depression contact Beyond Blue or Depressionnet

BUT in the last eight minutes Tim Cahill and John Aloise wrote their names into the World Cup record books kicking the first ever goals for an Australian team in a World Cup.

Just like many of my country men and women, I yelled, jumped off the couch and ran around the loungeroom with my jumper over my head………………well, not really, but I was excited.

I must say it was a fine conclusion to what had been a disapointing footy day for me as, in the afternoon, my beloved AFL team, Collingwood was ’slopped’ for the first time this season in a game that saw them look most ‘unorganised’ so it was great to see the Socceroos play well and win convincingly!

I must say it was also great to see all that yellow and green in the stands in Germany and to hear my fellow Aussies chanting and singing. I know it sounds a bit jingoistic…………a bit ‘Land down-under”, a bit “vegimite on toast”……..but it does a weird thing to me when I see representatives of my country perform well on the world stage…………even if it is just in a game, at least it’s an improvement on feeling totally ashamed by the performance of our political leaders in the same world environments!

I feel even more frustrated that we honour Aussie achievers on the birthday of the Queen of England, when we have been a federated and independant country for over 100 years! I simply dont “get it”!

I don’t get why, when given the opportunity, my countrymen and women voted down the option of becoming a republic, even though the model proposed wasn’t great. I don’t get why we have a “half-arsed” approach to independance. We are not a republic and yet a Queen’s birthday honour no longer entails a knighthood (as per the honours in the ‘mother country’), but an “Order of Australia” ………a pathetic attempt to sever the ties of colonialism without ‘biting the bullet’ and doing the thing properly!

You know what else I don’t understand????

Why are Australian honours which are supposed to recognise excellence, leadership and contribution, so focused on sport, politics and celebrity???

Not that I’m denegrating the sporting achievements of my Aussies contemporaries, but most sportspeople these days get paid extrodinarliy well for PLAYING A GAME! Most ‘normal’ people struggling to make ends meet would love a lifestyle like that! Fame, fortune and a Queen’s birthday award for playing rugby, tennis, golf etc. Not to mention the ex politicians who are recognised, purely because their party is in power and they are being acknowledged for ‘toe-ing the party line”.
I know that there ARE people recognised for selflessness, altruism and community contribution…………..but you never see these people on television, in the newspaper or hear them on the radio and I’m afraid they rarely receive the highest honours…………..they get the “Clayton’s honours” that noone really notices.

I think the time has come to review how we honour contributors in our country. We need to be recognising the people who contribute in their local communities, who sacrifice time, money and energy to make Australia a better place. We need to recognise the ‘quiet achievers” who volunteer, care, support and nurture others in their community. We need to recognise selfless leadership, creative thinking and generosity of spirit.

I know I’m an idealist, but I don’t think that fair recognition of true achievement is too much to ask. As for our great sportsmen/women, actors and politicians…………….I think they too would agree that there are numerous awards programs that adequately recognise achievement in their given careers and receipt of these awards should be a fine accomplishment for them.

One day, when we are a republic, I’d love to see the Australia Awards recognising the ‘little people” on a day that’s meaningful for us………….how about the Australia Day Awards being expanded to include the current number of Queens birthday awards? How about the status of the Australia Day Awards being increased and how about we look around our own communities and start nominating the people who do so much for us? I’m sure noone would object to that?

In addition to selling uranium from three mines in Australia, should we be looking at value adding????

Should we be establishing “tips” for spent nuclear waste and being paid by other countries for taking their garbage???

Should we be investing in nuclear power plants to address the issue of fossil fuel usage and consequently our contribution to global warming?

These are all big questions with very political implications, but questions we should be discussing, never the less.

I, for one, want to retain our three mine policy (no more than three active mines to be in operation at any one time) and must say if I had my way, all of our uranium would stay in the ground where it belongs. I am however, a realist and like other enlightened souls, fearful of the implications of global warming for the future of our planet …………and our country is notoriously poor in addressing reductions in emissions and fossil fuel usage.

It seems to me that policy makers either have their ‘head in the sand’ and won’t acknowledge the problem, have personal investments or interest in maintaining the status quo or are scared of alienating powerful allies who fall into one or both of the previous categories (our Prime Minister is a classic example of the latter).

I don’t profess to be a climate scientist or economist, however understand the financial implications of reducing our fossil fuel exports BUT can’t help but wonder why the COST of NOT doing anything isn’t being addressed during the current debate.

We could be leaders…………we could dramatically cut our usage of fossil fuels, reduce our exporting of coal, gas, timber and uranium and invest in the one thing we have extensivce access to SOLAR ENERGY.

We live in a wide, brown, sunny and drought prone country……..we have sun coming ‘out our ears”……….we have advanced solar technology that at present is poorly supported by big business investment and has potential to be the technology of the future……………and we’re doing nothing about it.

The time has come to invest in our future. Next time you think about how you’re going to heat your new house…………consider solar energy. When your gas hot water service leaks or needs replacement……….think about a solar hot water service.

Explore the options…………..look at renewable energy sources and do your bit for the planet you are leaving for your kids!

I have no pecunary interest in solar or renewable energy…………..just a huge concern for the future of our planet.

(MP3- 16.22 MB- 47.15MIN)

LISTEN TO PODCAST HERE   [audio:http://deadserious.thepodcastnetwork.com/audio/tpn_deadserious_20060526_035.mp3]

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“Hey baby, can’t you see I’m looking older?” George Michael sang and we all thought he was an ‘old coot’ reminiscing……but guess what…………it’s happening to us all, slowly and irreversably!

What does getting older mean? Are we destined to a future of walking sticks, mashed food and sitting in a nursing home watching day time ’soaps’ on TV?

What if we could live to be 1000 years old………….or what if we could live forever? Would this change how we lived our lives?

What happens to us as we age? What happens to our senses?

Is there a role in the world for older people or should they be thrown on the scrapheap?

This week’s episode of Dead Serious explores what ‘getting older’ means and how we can make maturity a positive, because it’s happening to us all and before we know it we will be facing the choice of living well as an older person or giving up and waiting to die.

Music provided by Dynamo’s Rhythm Aces and recorded on Skylook

” Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples”. George Burns

“I don’t feel old. I don’t feel anything until noon. Then it’s time for my nap”. Bob Hope

I have been involved in awareness week activities for some years now and every year it gets more difficult to get people to engage with the concept.

Palliative Care is really hard to sell from a PR perspective as generally people don’t want to know about it until they need it and by then they are needing personal support and really don’t care too much about what other people are thinking or feeling.

Palliative care isn’t ’sexy’…………….’hip’ people don’t take on the role of patrons for palliative care as they do for cancer or diabetes………….palliative care really is the ‘poor relation’ on the PR front.
When someone is told that their illness is terminal………….they won’t get better……in fact they will die well before they had anticipated…………….the shock and distress is immeasurable.

In order for people to know where to get help and support, we need to raise community awareness about palliative care so that everyone in our community knows that help is available and how to access it.

We need to talk about death. We need to educate our kids and families. We need to be supportive to people in our communities who are suffering from illness or the grief of a recent significant death.

So I’m NOT asking you to volunteer to work with dying people or to sacrifice part of your salary to a palliative care service……….what i’m asking of you is simple…………………..have ONE conversation about death or grief this week. Talk to a friend about organ donation. Ask a colleague if they have ever had a family member cared for by a palliative care team. Ask your siblings or your kids if they know what palliative care is.

If YOU don’t know much about palliative care……………..educate yourself this week. Scroll back to some of the past Dead Serious episodes and listen to the ones that focus on palliative care……………do a ‘google’ search and read an article or two……………..buy a book that deals with end of life issues………………give some thought to how YOU feel about death and dying.

Be part of the solution………………HELP RAISE PALLIATIVE CARE AWARENESS THIS WEEK.

Those of you who are not a mum or who don’t have a mum may say…………so what, but I think most of you will have some sort of a connection for one reason or another with a mother of some sort.

For me………….I have a mother, a mother-in-law, a step mother-in-law and I am a mother to boot, so I guess you could say I have a “full hand”.

Being a mother is not all it’s cracked up to be. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE my kids and enjoy their company immensely, but I am finding that the older they get, the more difficult it isfor me to protect them from the trialls and tribulations of life, and that can be hard!

I don’t want to keep them “wrapped in cotton wool”, but I hate seeing them sad, anxious or struggling. I want to make things good for them. I want them to be happy, healthy and safe.

When they are little, you can’t wait for their next milestone. You want them to smile, to crawl, to walk, to talk. But before you can blink they have boyfriends/girlfriends, their hearts are being broken, they fall prey to people who take them for granted, they are deceived and hurt……………..AND THERE’S NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO PROTECT THEM.

The one bummer about being a mum when your kids are grown up is…………….it doesnt matter how old they are, you want to protect them and you can’t. You have to let them live, and living means trusting people you probably shouldnt trust, trying things you probably shouldnt try and feeling the joys of love and the distress of heartbreak.

I guess the one thing I’ve learned is that my kids have to do things their way, without interference from me, but that I need to make sure I’m around when they need a hug, a loan or someone to come with a truck to move their stuff from a disasterous ‘house share’ arrangement!

The weird thing is I can remember my mother saying to me when I was in my early 20’s that it gets harder, not easier as your kids grow up………………I never thought I’d see the day when I actually agreed with anything my mum said!

So I spent Mothers Day with two of my georgeous kids and spoke to the third one via sattelite phone (he’s in the ‘outback’ doing geological surveys). I laughed with them, talked and joked and remembered how very lucky I was to have three wonderful kids who I could worry about…………………lots of people don’t have that privalege!

So to the Mum’s out there……………..I hope you had a great day with your kids. To the kids out there………….remember, before you can blink you will find yourself with kids of your own and all of a sudden the words of your own mother won’t seem like ‘crap’ anymore, because you will understand them for the wisdom they contain!

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY

I watched the coverage on TV from early this morning with disbelief as the two men walked out of the mine elevator, embraced their families and headed, on foot to the two waiting ambulances. They looked surprisingly fit and well, given their ordeal.

I then watched interviews with rescuers, the mine manager, union representatives and towns people. I looked carefully at the faces of people as they enjoyed a well deserved beer in the pub, which had opened early for the celebrations. I noticed the strain on those faces. I saw big, strong men smiling, but there was an underlying saddness in the eyes of those men. They were deservedly rejoycing in their success, but the underlying saddness, that one of their mates didn’t make it out………is also written on those faces.

I can’t help but think of what lays ahead for this community. This afternoon they will attend the funeral of Larry Knight, the father of four and mate of the two rescued miners, who did not survive the accident. The community has been on a roller coaster ride over the past two weeks and I can’t help but think that the ride is far from over.

Post traumatic stress, uncertainty about the financial future of the town as the accident is investigated, the grief attached to the death of Larry Knight, the hole left after the huge media contingent shifts their focus from Beaconsfield, packs up and leaves the town and the knowledge that everyone in the town needs to make meaning of their experience and live on in the face of their trauma……………….all of this is now ahead of them.

The journey has just commenced for the people of Beaconsfield…………..we need to remember that they will all be suffering over the weeks, months and years to come, long after the world has forgotten.

Australia’s media outlets have been consumed by the rescue, with hour by hour coverage of the slow progress to construct a tunnel paralell to the collapsed tunnel in order to rescue the men. Radio, TV and print media are full of stories from next door neighbors, local officials, the local store owner, friends of the men………….in fact anyone they can get to talk about the men in order to gain an “edge” in their coverage.

The families of Webb and Russell were jubilant when the men were found alive and were speaking freely to the media, until the days began to pass without the men being rescued. They have now “gone to ground” and who can blame them?

Stories of camera crews filming over back fences, sneaking around the town trying to get a ’scoop’ abound. Every ‘direct cross’ to Beaconsfield shows the huge media contingent which far outstrips the population of this small rural Tasmanian town. The newspapers carry speculative stories about how much television networks are ‘bidding’ to secure the exclusive story of the miners once they reach the surface.

In the meantime, two men are still a mile below the surface of the earch, confined in a small space and although they now have received food, blankets and MP3 players, they still live with the fear that their rescue may actually result in a further rock fall which could still cause their deaths.

It all makes me wonder………….when does news coverage mutate and become ‘voyarism’? When did the suffering of others become entertainment for the rest of us?

I can’t help but think of those two men, cold, dirty and scared beyond our capacity to imagine………….every minute could be their last………..one wrongly placed explosive could see the end of the rescue mssion and the beginning of a retrieval mission.

I can’t help think about their wives, children and parents, trapped in their own homes while marauding media pace the boundaries of their homes.

I can’t help but think of the towns people whose lives have been turned upside down and whose futures look bleak as the main employer in the town and source of jobs and prosperity (the mine) will be certainly NOT survive the accident.

I can’t help but think of the paramedics and mine rescuers, themselves friends and colleagues of the trapped men, tired, anxious and trying to perform in a professional way when they know how very high the odds are.

I can’t help but think of the family of Larry Knight………..they have delayed his funeral until Webb and Russell are rescued so that they can attend, but this will not be a rescue for them. Their son, husband and father is not coming back, they know this, but will be hoping and praying that his friends will be rescued.

All of this pain, all of this stress, all of this emotion and saddness in a town whose population is not much more than 1300. A town flooded by media, who when this is all over will pack up their cameras, their scaffold and their lights and go back home to the big cities and on to the next story.

What will be left for Beaconsfield? The trauma of a mining accident. The death of ‘one of their own’. The financial collapse of the major employer in the region and a population who will all suffer, in their own way, from post traumatic stress, not least of which will be Webb and Russell who will take years to make any sense of their experience………..if their rescue is successful.

So on this cold, wet Sunday morning, my thoughts are with the people of Beaconsfield……………..their healing journey will be a very long one and they will all need as much support as we can offer them, particularly once the eyes of the world turn to the next big news story and they are forgotten.

[audio:http://deadserious.thepodcastnetwork.com/audio/tpn_deadserious_20060428_034.mp3]

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This weeks show continues my discussion with Shane Holst, Founder of the Australian Altruism Foundation.

We look at some challenging concepts including the failure of the expedential economic growth model and what this model has in common with cancer (the disease not the star sign).

Shane talks about ways of “making a difference” to the world and how we can overcome the apathy of others and focus on excelling rather than “treading water”. He gives us some strategies for exploring our personal strengths.

Shane also shares his personal experiences of childhood abuse and how he overcame these experiences and developed personal resilience. He talks about his experiences in the Navy, his experiences in war zones and his understanding of the personal impact of Post traumatic stress.

We discuss the role of spirituality in Shane’s life and how his personal spiritual connection has assisted him to make ‘meaning’ of very negative life experiences by “surrendering to the mystery”.

We also talk about the upcoming “Turtle Awards” and their role in recognising people who “stick their neck’s out for the common good”.

This is a very personal and revealing interview with a man who has accommodated many negative life experiences with his own brand of humour and compassion.

Music is provided by “Simpatico” and I thank Victor for sharing his music.
Recorded on Skylook.

A.N.Z.A.C stands for Australian and New Zealand Army Corps and is commemmorated on April 25th as it marks the anniversary of the first major military action fought by Australian and New Zealand forces during World War 1, fourteen years after Australia celebrated federation. The soldiers in these forces became knows as “ANZACS”.

Why do we commemmorate an action such as the Gallipoli landing which was a resounding military failure?

Well, we’re not CELEBRATING Anzac Day, but commemorating the sacrifices made by millions of young men (some of them as young as 16) who left their homes, their farms, their families to travel to the other side of the world to fight a war that they thought would ensure the safety of their country.

With the benefit of time, it’s hard to imagine how these young men thought that Australia or New Zealand faced any threat in real terms from the war in Europe, but we need to understand the power of imperial influence in our newly federated country. In 1915, although now no longer a mere colony of the British, Australia was a very young country and people regarded Britain as the “mother country”. Given that Britain was under threat, of course, it was considered that all Commonwealth countruies faced the same threat, and therefore were responsible for defending democracy. It’s hard to imaging that enormous response happening now in the same circumstances.

The ANZAC ‘legend’ was born of the bravery and sacrifice of these young men (8000 Australian soldiers were killed and thousands more wounded) facing a formidible enemy with little hope of victory, but with a spirit of mateship and support for each other.

April 25th was officially named “ANZAC Day” in 1916 and was marked by memorial services throughout Australia and a march through London. It has grown to represent the sacrifice of all subsequent soldiers who have fought since that first landing at Gallipoli and has become a day of national commemoration.

WHT AM I TELLING YOU ALL OF THIS?

I always attend the local dawn service on ANZAC Day and year by year am surprised by the intensity of my reaction. Yes, I had a grandfather who fought both at Gallipoli, on the Somme and latter in WW2, I have uncles and other relations who fought in WW2 and Vietnam, but luckily for my family, they all came home, although as always they were irrepairably damaged by their experiences…………..

For some strange reason, as I stand at the local memorial each April 25th, with waves crashing on the beach only a few metres away, watching the dark night sky gradually lighten with the dawn and listen to the bugle sound the “Last Post”, my eyes fill with tears, my heart vibrates inside my chest and I feel so connected to those young men who lept from their boats and ran towards the beach on foreign soil, not knowing what lay ahead.

I can’t explain why I feel like this…………..to be honest I can’t explain why I feel compelled every year to attend the Dawn service………….but I do.

Once the service is complete, I always walk home along the beach. This year, I walked down to the end of the jetty and watched the sun peak over the hills. I sat, surrounded by water and looked up at the sky, where the cresent moon was still clearly visible with Venus twinkling above it and I thought about how it must have been for the Turkish soldiers, waiting up on the hills and looking down at the boats landing full of soldiers ready to invade their country.

I can’t really explain the depth of emotion I felt, sitting there in the cold with the waves lapping at my feet, but I can tell you I felt so connected to ALL of those young men and women who over the years have been “packed off” to fight for their country, ignorant of the diplomatic and political ramifications of their deployment.

The message in all of this is that we so often use our youngest, fittest and brightest as “cannon fodder” for the failure of politicians and diplomats to negotiate human outcomes to human problems. Whole generations have been sacrificed in every country around our world over the centuries because of greed, power and corruption. When are we going to come up with a way of negotiating our differences that doesn’t require this ultimate sacrifice? WHY CAN’T WE ACKNOWLEDGE OUR DIFFERENCES AND LEARN TO LIVE TOGETHER, INSPIRED BY OUR DIVERSITY?
I think this is the reason why every Anzac Day, I spend time reflecting on all of that lost potential…………..and praying that we find a way to stop it ever happening again!

“Altruism……………hard to say, easy to do?”

What the hell is ‘altruism’? I hear you say.

My guest this week, Mr Shane Holst, is the founder of the Australian Altruism Foundation, an organisation established to explore ways of making the world a better place by encouraging humanitarianism, compassion and creative leadership.

Shane, inspired by the community building theories of M. Scott Peck, decided that he needed to do more to contributeto his personal, local and the global community and has done so via the foundation and by establishing an award program that recognises self-lessness and excellence in contemporary leaders (The Turtle Awards)…….recognising people who ’stick their neck out’ for the common good. The patron of the Australian Altruism Foundation is Dr. Patch Adams, a man equally passionate about improving the lives of people by empowering them, and having fun at the same time!

For regular listeners and readers of the Blog, you will know why I feel a committment to the work Shane is doing………..he manages to see beyond the boundaries established by regulation and legislation to keep us ‘under control’ and see the true potential of each individual to contribute to the world around them.

Shane talks about ” providing real nutrition for the spirit” and how high profile members of our community need to focus on setting an example for others. He discusses ways we can find a spiritual and psychological balance in our lives and how the time has come to stop blaming other people and take responsibility for our own actions.

Shane explores the suffering of young people and talks about how we can connect with people who feel disenfranchised and disaffected.

He explores the concept of humanity as an organic entity and how we are ‘communal’ creatures and that the ‘nuclear family’ is an economic experiment that has failed………where do we go from here? How do we break this economic model and become more communal?

Listen in and find some new ideas, some inspiration and some creative ideas!

The music “J-Roc’s Ferrett” is kindly provided by Mike Schulze

This program, as always, recorded on Skylook.

Don’t forget to log on next week for part 2 of this inspirational and motivating interview. Shane challenges us to review our lives and to take ‘a good hard look’ at where we are heading and see if it’s really where we WANT to be!

Well I have a good excuse…………..apart from it being Good Friday, I went off on the weekend for a Crystal Workshop with an inspiring woman, Rachelle Charman, and spent some devoted time to ‘getting to know’ my crystals and how to work with them more effectively.

What good is that to us? I hear you say………………well I’ve put the ‘hard word’ on Rachelle and am hoping to have her on the show in the very near future, so that you too, will be able to learn from her vast knowledge and experience.

So get yourself a crystal or two and have a play with them…………..they are amazing amplifiers of energy and any of you who work with Reiki or other energy modalities will find them amazing companions!

In the meantime this weeks show will be up on the server by the end of the week……………another inspiring person, Shane Holst, Founder of the Australian Altruism Foundation………………so tune in!

Is there something in this story that can assist us even when we do not believe in Christianity or is Easter just a chance for a few days off work? Be you Hindu, Jew, Muslim, Buddist, athiest or agnostic, metaphysician or Scientologist…………….the themes of Easter relate to us all.

What are the themes of Easter? If you think about it, these are many and varied but they are UNIVERSAL.

From my perspective there’s the element of suffering, submission to a ‘greater cause’ despite the pain it may cause ourselves and others, struggle with wether to take the easy path and regret it or to take the hard road and achieve something worthwhile. Don’t we all have to face these choices day after day?

We watch people suffer and we suffer ourselves, the cause of our suffering doesn’t matter…….it can be anything from illness, injury, poverty, lonleness, regrets, grief or isolation………..but suffer we do…all of us in our own way, with our own challenges.

We are forced to make choices on a daily basis……….do we support companies that are destroying the earth because we can buy a packet of buscuits 5 cents cheaper OR do we take the hard road and pay more for products produced by ethical companies who pay their workers well and care for the environment?

Do we say hurtful things to other people because they have hurt us OR do we forgive them and let go of the resentment that will eventually eat away at our spirit?

These things all relate directly to the Easter story and it doesn’t matter if we believe that Jesus was a real man, the Son of God or the figment of some ancient prophet’s imagination……..suffering and choice is reality for us all.

The main Easter theme, however is not that suffering is “a given” and we just have to endure it. I think the main theme of Easter is that transformation is possible, and in the midst of what may seem insurmountable odds, triumph is waiting for us to recognise it and “grab it with both hands”.

Resurrection is not a word that is owned by the churches……………….resurrection is something we can all achieve. It represents triumph over adversity and transformation of spirit………….it has been demonstrated by great peacemakers like Gandhi, Nelson Mandella, Lech Walesa, Desmond Tutu, Mikail Gorbachev, Xanana Gusmao, José Ramos-Horta, His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama, Rigoberta Menchú Tum, and Eddie Mabo. (If you don’t know of any of these people ‘google’ them and find out about their achievements).

Resurrection is demonstrated by contemporary writers, thinkers and peaceful activists. It is seen in the faces of diasbled sports men and women competing in the Olympic and Commonwealth Games. It is demonstrated by people controlling their alcohol and drug addictions and contributing positively to society. It is demonstrated by poor children in Africa who (with support) go on to study as professionals and return to their homeland to help their countrymen and women. It is demonstrated by Medicines san frontier staff who put their lives on the line for the benefit of others, by volunteers who leave their own homes to burn while they are in another state or country fighting bushfires, by volunteers who sit with people as they die, by frail, elderly parents who care for their adult disabled children with little assistance…………………the list is endless.

Look around you…………observe the suffering and observe the triumphs………the resurrections………….this is the true meaning of Easter. This is what we should be thinking about as we sit around leisurely over the next few days, relaxing with our families and friends.

How have we suffered? Are we suffering now? What path will WE take…….the easy road or the road that leads to personal transformation and the resurrection of our OWN spirit?

The answer to this question is up to us…………..but THE most important thing is to think about it……….to think about the relevance of the Easter story in our own lives and to not fall into the “dark night of the soul” which is always the result of DOING NOTHING.

Easter brings us hope………………apathy brings us dispair……………..which will you choose?

I hope you find Easter a contemplative and relaxing time and emerge refreshed, revived and with your spirit transformed!

My answer……….(mindful that I’m not the all knowing auricle) ……………firstly follow cultural traditions. if it is culturally significant to wear black, or white or orange………………do so. If it’s culturally significant for women to cover their heads (wear a hat, scarf etc.) do so.

If there is no cultural dress requirement……………..the answer is less clear, but these are the things I would consider:

- Wear something respectful but appropriate eg. an old pair of track pants and a torn teeshirt would not appear respectful for the funeral of an aged aunt, but may be appropriate for the funeral of a young person who was into ‘grunge’.
- Wear something you feel comfortable in as it will be a long day (so stilleto heels might not work, particularly if you intend to go to the cemetry as you will sink into the lawn)
- Don’t wear the sort of clothes you’d wear to a nightclub…………….you’re not there to “pick up” but to celebrate the life of someone you care about who has died.
- Make sure you take an umbrella and wear a coat if it’s in the winter as the grave side service is stressful enough without being freezing cold and wet from an unexpected downpour of rain.
- Make sure your clothes are clean and ironed………..go to some trouble……..remember you loved this person!
- Have a haircut, shower, and shave (if youre a bloke) and girls, make sure you wear subtle makeup (remember, mascara and dark eyeshadow don’t respond well with tears)
- Take or wear your sunglasses, this can make you feel more comfortable to cry openly (if you want to)
- Lastly, make sure you take plenty of handerchefs or tissues, there’s nothing worse than loud ’sniffing’ during a funeral service, it can really distract people from the reason they are there.

Sometimes it is easier if there are rules about dress, it makes the decision making process more certain. When this is not the case, just remember that you loved this person and you are going to say “goodbye”, so dress comfortably but thoughtfully. You don’t need to rush out and buy a new suit (though you may do this if it makes you feel more comfortable), so long as you present yourself in a way that is respectful and takes time, because this too………….the preparation………..is part of the ritual.

Sacred Ceremony and Power Animals…………..a marathon episode that will leave ‘no stone unturned”!

Today my special guest is Dr. Steven Farmer, a spiritual psychotherapist, shamanic practitioner, author and former university professor with over thirty years experience as a professional healer and teacher.

Steven talks about the historic role of ritual and sacred ceremony and how we can incorporate these essential elements into our modern lives in order to acknowledge life milestones and to help us recognise significant events and create meaning around life experiences.

Steven gives us practical tips on how to acknowledge transitions, deaths, births, marriages, moves including how to clear and bless a new home, how to ritually ‘say goodbye’ to an old one and how to make ritual memorable.

Steven also talks about animals: power animals, totem animals and animal companions and messengers. He helps us to understand their roles and how to access them for guidance and support. Steven explains how animals perform the role of “spirit guides” and what this means for us as humans.

Steven is extremely generous in sharing with us his personal insights and experiences in working with animal spirit guides and talks about his new book, “Animal Spirit Guides” which contains over 200 individual messages from animal guides.

Steven travels the world speaking and conducting workshops and we are extremely fortunate that he generously agreed to spend time with us on this weeks episode of Dead Serious.

The music track “Life” is provided by a friend of both myself and Steven’s, Jeremy Donovan, himself a past guest on the program.

This program was recorded on Skylook.

REMEMBER………….feedback via the Blog (under comments) is always most welcome!

I’ve had lots of comments about how informative the Blog is, but the outlines in here only provide a fraction of the information that’s contained in the shows.

So……………get yourself a cheap MP3 player, download the show and have a listen………………….or better still subscribe to the RSS feed so that you have streamlined access to the shows as soon as they go up onto the server!

Happy listening and keep up the feedback……………it does my soul good and makes all the effort worthwhile!!!

Thanks to you all,

Molly

I just spent the evening talking to a large group of older ladies about angels and how to connect with them………………something that regular listeners and readers of the Blog will know, I do on a regular basis.

It never ceases to amaze me how we treat the ‘elders’ of our community. We make presumptions about them that have very little grounding in fact. We presume they are ultra conservative, narrow minded, forgetful, ‘daggy’ or old fashioned and usually ‘grumpy’!

We think they ‘live in the past’ and have little connection to contemporary life…………………HOW WRONG WE ARE!

Age brings with it wisdom, insight and understanding. Older people have so much to offer us and are so graciously accepting of the little we offer them.

Talking about angels, connecting with them and seeing the joy on the faces of these ladies reminded me that we can presume NOTHING about older people. This was a group of open minded, enthusiastic and intelligent women, prepared to experiment and expand their personal views of spirituality…………………WE CAN LEARN SO MUCH FROM THEM.

Maybe the next time you are stuck behind an older person in the street, instead of thinking about how they are dressed or getting angry with them because they are slowing you down from your ‘important business’……………..don’t push past them………take a breath, slow down, smile and say hello and mentally thank them for MAKING you slow down for a few minutes in your hectic day!

This is a gift……………..older people walk slowly not just because they want to aggrivate us, but because there is a lesson in this for us………slow down, appreciate the moment, consider how fortunate you are and maybe use the few minutes of non activity to connect with divinity inside YOU.

Have you given any thought to what songs you would like played at your funeral?

If you have, I hope you dont have the same problem as me……………….my family say my funeral will need to run over a week to accommodate all of the music I’ve listed!

Don’t ponder this too much………….as that “shoe crew” say …………..JUST DO IT!

(MP3- 10.4MB- 30.33min)

This week we continue the exploration of the ritual and ceremony of Funerals.

We explore what happens after the formal funeral ceremony. What is the role of the pall bearers? Why do some people choose cremation and others burial? How is this choice influenced by cultural and religious traditions?

I explain the purpose of the “wake” as a less structured and informal ritual of support and community connection.

We explore in detail what is involved in planning your funeral in advance. Have you thought of doing this? Have you discussed it with your family? Have you considered organ donation or donation of your body to science or for medical research? Why would people consider this as an option and what would limit their ability to do this?

What happens when there is no body? If the peoson’s body is unable to be retreived, how do families construct a meaningful ritual in this situation?

Lots of “food for thought” in this week’s episode that I hope will encourage you to talk about your plans with the people you love and will enable you to better understand the options that are available to you when someone you love dies.

The track, “Take my Love” is generously provided by Simpatico

Feedback, as always is welcomed via the Blog